Saturday, June 25, 2011

Prohibition

Ayutthaya, 6/25/11
It's primary election night in Thailand, which means alcohol is prohibited for 24 hours. Trucks customized with large loudspeakers and posters of candidates roam the streets of Ayutthaya loudly announcing stump speeches and scaring stray dogs. The alcohol ban is admirable, presumably maintaining national sobriety so citizens can focus on the issues and make informed decisions.

However, as is typically the case, the prohibition simply promotes Thais to drink more. A few bars are closed, including our hang, Gun Bar, but most defy the ban. Once prohibition goes into effect at 6pm, my bartender grabs my beer bottle and pours it from a frosted glass into an orange paper cup reading "24 Hour Coffee, Lattes, and Cappuccinos." I don't know who they're kidding, especially since the barkeep proudly toasts me with her whiskey & soda. "Chon, chon", she says.

The next bar is even worse, pouring Chang Beer into shallow tea cups. If a cop was passing by, he could identify the liquid from ten feet away. However, the vibe of this new bar is splendid. The establishment is oddly named "Chang's" after the most popular beer in Thailand, as if the owner thought he could separate his bar from the crowd by choosing the name of the most average, widespread beverage in the nation. A 70-something Thai gentleman, resembling a thinner David Crosby but sharing the same gray handlebar mustache, plays guitar and sings Steve Miller and Bob Marley covers. Flemming and I toast with Karli and Matt from Vancouver and the beautiful Emma from Holland who looks like a curvy Bond femme fatale.


The three are hostel buddies the nearby Murdock Thai Hostel, twenty minutes south, and they've brought along the hotel's lovely proprietor, Samsee. The owner's age is not completely clear. She's definitely older than 50, but could easily be 79. Samsee has well-worn, dark brown leathery skin with dramatic crow's feet and four yellow teeth, tops. She puts her arm around us, dancing to "Layla" and clinks beer-filled tea cups. Samsee is delightfully cheerful, thrilled to share the night with a handful of farang. Every time someone utters a joke, she slaps his shoulder, howling "Mai Ben Raih," meaning "nevermind" in Thai. Samsee's other favorite move is to look one of our female companions dead in the eyes, potentially flashing a rogue tooth, and shout, "One more night! One more beer! One more man!" I'm all for women's lib, but Samsee could be supportive of my plight as well.


Samsee's friend/work slave arrives at the bar and seven of us pile into his old, rusted, white Civic and head back to Murdock Thai Hostel. Upon arrival, we share Thai whiskey leftover from last night and all get to know each other better. Samsee leaves briefly at 2am and returns with a giant plate of sweet & sour rice noodles, rich in oyster sauce, soy, sugar, and chilis, which we devour like pigs on a freshly poured trough. Emma (unfortunately) heads to bed early at 2:30 and is replaced briefly by a forty-something, balding, rotund Finnish man and his Thai girlfriend, who is roughly 20. Mr. Finland keeps putting his arm around his purchase, who reciprocates with cold death stares as she intensely text messages her friends, her angry face illuminated by the phone's glow. Finny proudly tells us that Thailand is his favorite vacation destination, arriving at least twice a year, last in December 2010. He clearly stays in Ayutthaya to not be noticed, although I'm sure his physician does.

When the happy couple leaves, Samsee informs us that Mr. Finland has been staying at her hostel for twelve days and this young girl is his seventh. According to Samsee, his tastes have been getting increasingly more discriminating over the week and the price tags have fluctuated accordingly. This particular girl is roughly the equivalent of my Advanced Scuba certification. At least when I paid that much people smiled and talked to me. But to this young Thai girl, emotion is attachment's bedfellow. So she sits there texting her friends, dreaming of better times and more attractive men, silently repeating Samsee's mantra, "One more night! One more beer! One more man!"

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